“Suffering Presence”

Job 2:11-13

Introduction

A. We are now introduced to 3 of Job’s friends

“Job 2:11 gives us the names of Job’s three friends – Eliphaz the Temantie, Bildad the Shuhite, and Zophar the Naamathite. Not much is known about Job’s 3 friends beyond what is given to us in their dialogues with Job in this book. However, it is interesting to note that the name Eliphaz only appears one other time in the Bible-in Genesis 30:10. Here we find that Eliphaz is one of the sons of Esau, brother of Jacob. While we don’t know for certain if this Eliphaz is the same man recorded in Job, it is interesting to consider that Job may have been a contemporary of Jacob and Esau.”                                  (Tried, Test and Triumphant, Vol. 1 p. 38; Dr. David Jeremiah)

Purpose

“To find responses to suffering that are helpful and honoring to God.”

Commentary

Job 2:11-13 (NKJV)

¹¹ Now when Job’s three friends heard of all this adversity that had come upon him, each one came from his own place–Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite, and Zophar the Naamathite (These men were probably wealthy sheiks who had the time and the money to leave their homes and be gone from their businesses in order to visit Job. It’s possible that they’d even met Job in the business world – we don’t know, other than they all had come from different places to visit Job). For they had made an appointment together 1) to come and mourn with him, and 2) to comfort him. (Two-fold purpose for their visit)

A. So here we meet what we might call:

1. “The Original 3 Amigos”

2. 3 Men simply known as ‘Job’s Friends’

B. Now Job obviously had more than 3 friends;

1. But these were the 3 that made an appointment together to come & see Job

C. When we get into chapter 32, we’ll meet another one of Job’s friends;

1. A man by the name of Elihu, who is apparently much younger

D. Now as we’re introduced to these 3 friends of Job –

1. For the most part, Job’s 3 friends get it wrong throughout the book of Job;

            2. However, here in the beginning, they do it right

E. They set on a mission of mercy to come and comfort Job;

            1. And for the 1^st 7 days, they do just that…

            2. But very shortly thereafter, things change, and they become accusatory towards Job

                        a. And their mission of mercy quickly fades, as a matter of fact:

“The longer they stayed, the worse things got. The more argumentative, and the more judgmental, and the more intense the dialogue. However they did come.”   – Chuck Swindoll

Characteristics of True Friends:

          #1. Friends care enough to come without being asked to come

                        a. Nobody sent the men a message to come & bring a little sympathy

                                    i. Real friends show up when a friend is hurting

                                    ii. Friends don’t need an invitation, spontaneously, they come

                        b. If a friend of yours has a heart attack and is taken to the hospital;

                                    i. It isn’t long before you’re there

                                    ii. You don’t wait for an invitation

          #2. Friends respond with sympathy and comfort

                        a. Sympathy includes identifying with the sufferer

                                    i. Friends do that

“Comfort is attempting to ease the pain by helping to make the sorrow lighter. You run errands for them. You take care of the kids. You provide a meal. You assist wherever you need to assit because you want to comfort them.”                         – Charles Swindoll

          #3. Friends openly express the depth of their feelings

                        a. It’s not unusual for the friend to express deep feelings

                                    i. Casual acquaintances don’t usually do that

                                    ii. Genuine friends make their feelings known

          #4. Friends aren’t turned off by distasteful sights

                        a. On the contrary, they come alongside and they get as close as possible

                                    i. Friends aren’t offended because the room has a foul smell

                                    ii. Friends don’t turn away when sickness reduces a person to a shell

                        b. True friends see beyond all that

                                    i. They don’t walk away because they see the bottoms dropped out of your

                                                life and you are at wits end

                                    ii. On the contrary, it draws them in

          #5. Friends understand so they say very little

“The best way to help people who are hurting is just to be with them saying little or nothing, and letting them know you care. Don’t try to explain everything; explanations never heal a broken heart. If his friends had listened to him accepted his feelings, and not argued with him, they would have helped him greatly; but they chose to be prosecuting attorneys instead of witnesses.” W. Wiersbe

F. Together, the 3 set out from their homes to go and sympathize with Job & comfort him

            1. Their friendship with Job was such as to bind them to Job;

                        a. Even in his sufferings and pain

G. What a blessing to have just one friend like this in time of need;

            1. Somebody who’d drop everything at a moment’s notice & travel any distance

            2. And then stick by one’s bedside night and day for an entire week!

                        a. Job apparently had not just 1 such friend, but 3!

H. Even the Apostle Paul didn’t have 3 good friends towards the end of his life;

            1. So 3 good friends in time of affliction is a very great number!

I. They came to comfort Job, but as we’ll see;

            1. They’ll actually end up condemning him:

                        a. Analyzing him up & down for his faults

                        b. Loopholes and hidden sins

                        c. Grasping for reasons for why all these terrible things had happened to Job

“The main problem with this mission of mercy was that no mercy was forthcoming.” M. Mason
¹² And when they raised their eyes from afar, and did not recognize him, they lifted their voices and wept; and each one tore his robe and sprinkled dust on his head toward heaven.

A. But when they saw Job,

1. They could hardly recognize him

B. And they offered up these traditional gestures of grief:

            1. They began to weep aloud

            2. They tore their robes and sprinkled dust on their heads

¹³ So they sat down with him on the ground seven days and seven nights, and no one spoke a word to him, for they saw that his grief was very great.

A. Job’s friends stayed because they had every reason to be near him

            1. The kind of anguish this man’s going through,

                        a. He may have died at any moment for all they knew

            2. So they stayed at his side with their lips sealed

            3. It was what happened after those 7 days that fouled things up

                        a. The longer they stayed, the worse things became

“The moment we find ourselves in trouble of any kind-sick in the hospital, bereaved by a friends’ death, dismissed from a job or relationship, depressed or bewildered-people start showing up telling us exactly what is wrong with us and what we must do to get better. Sufferers attract fixers the way road kills attract vultures. At first we are impressed they bother with us and amazed at their facility with answers. They know so much! How did they get to be such experts in living?!

          More often than not, these people use the Word of God frequently and loosely. They are full of spiritual diagnosis and prescription. It all sounds so hopeful. Bu then we begin to wonder, ‘Why is it that for all their apparent compassion we feel worse instead of better after they’ve said the piece?’

          The Book of Job is not only a witness to the dignity of suffering and God’s presence in our suffering but is also our primary biblical protest against religion that has been reduced to explanations or ‘answers.’ Many of the answers that Job’s so-called friends give him are technically true. But it is the ‘technical’ part that ruins the. They are answers without personal relationship, intellect without intimacy. The answers are slapped onto Job’s ravaged life like labels on a specimen bottle.  Job rages against this secularized wisdom that has lost touch with the living realities of God.”                        – Eugene Peterson; Introduction to Job ‘The Message’

Chuck Swindoll:

“The late Joe Bayly and his wife, Mary Lou, lost 3 of their children. They lost one son following surgery when he was only 18 days old. They lost the 2^nd boy at age five because of leukemia. They then lost a 3^rd son at eighteen years after a sledding accident, because of complications related to his hemophilia.

          Joe writes in a wonderful book, The View from a Hearse:

‘I was sitting, torn by grief. Someone came and talked to me of God’s dealings, of why it happened, of hope beyond the grave. He talked constantly, he said things I knew were true.

          I was unmoved, except I wished he’d go away. He finally did.

          Another came and sat beside me. He didn’t talk. He didn’t ask leading questions. He just sat beside me for an hour and more, listened when I said something, answered briefly, prayed simply, left.

          I was moved. I was comforted. I hated to see him go’.”

B. Friends have done it right when those in the crucible hate to see you go

            1. Our presence and our tears say much more than our words

“Words have a hollow ring in a crucible.”